Ooops I did it again.
I didn't post on Monday.
I have been too busy
locating the world's ugliest pair of Jeffrey Campbell's
reading about finger condoms in Food Service Safety
attending Phoenix Suns games
to remember to post a
Lyric of the Week.
As I also did last week,
I'll incorporate it into today's confession post,
which actually features
to make up for my lack of consistent bloggage lately.
I have the strangest and most unhealthy addiction to
TLC's hit show
Toddlers and Tiaras.
Yeah, I'm aware it's pretty bad.
It all started when I first saw this commercial:
My love for the show was only further validated by this ultra classy
Here that hot mess of a family unit is again:
Like I stated previously,
I've recently been attending lots of Suns games.
My dear friend Isaac
works as a camera man there
and I ran into him
at last Saturday's game.
He asked what section I was sitting in,
I told him where I was located,
and I requested he send up
the sluts who throw free t-shirts
to my area.
After half time,
I knew free shirt time was getting close.
I was bracing myself to catch a free shirt
when all of a sudden I saw Isaac
running up the stairs to me
with his camera.
I was confused.
I had asked for sluts with shirts.
Then I looked up at the monitor and saw
in big letters.
He pointed the camera at my friend and me
and with the
window of time I was given to react...
I decided it would be best
to do a
Toddlers and Tiaras
It was a full on
complete with me
batting my lashes,
tracing a heart around my face.
everyone and their mom was at the Suns game
and saw me act like a toddler,
I received a flood of messages.
The messages didn't stop for the rest of the night.
At least on the way out someone gave us free pizza,
holla honey boom boom.
In honor of this wholesome television program
the over-the-top impression I unveiled at the game,
I give you a song I'd use in a routine
if I was ever a pageant girl...
"She's a very kinky girl
the kind you don't take home to mother
she will never let your spirits down
once you get her off the streets"
As heard in Super Freak by Rick James.
Wondering why I'd choose said song
what routine the song would accompany?
Here is your answer: